Don’t get sick

Don’t get sick in Zimbabwe unless there’s hard currency at hand for private care. Public health is a death trap, Go in standing up and come out in a box. The diagnositics here: big cars and hospitalisation abroad for the bosses worth zillions more than the value of new cancer, dialysis and radiography machines.

With a gammy leg and broken wrist right now – minor in comparison to most folk needing treatment – I should know. It has been noticeable that many of our sickening poor are asking relatives in the diaspora to pay doctors’ fees in hard currency as demanded. Local medical insurance paid for in worthless local dollars is a f**k up 

We are allowed to use the the four-letter word now because academics in Britain have said it has overtaken bloody as the most used swear word in the English language. Movies cautioned only for no under 13 year olds are full of it as a noun and a verb and an adjective. I blame the Americans.

Even newspapers are using it. British Prime Minister Ms Truss is amid a Tory clusterf**k or a trussterf**k, as one paper put it. Another four letter word is gaining purchase these days too, but I prefer to say ‘silly Cnut’  as per the ancient English king who sat on the beach and commanded the incoming tides not to wet his feet.

The dress Ms Truss wore at her party conference resembled the one Emma Thompson had on in the the dystopian television drama Years and Years about a far right premier.

Truss defenders say she wore a dress like that in 2019, before the tv drama came out. If nothing else, then, she should fire her wardrobe advisor for getting her to wear old tat.

But out went chancellor Kwazi ‘Kamikwazi’ Kwarteng, of Ghanaian ancestry, to whom one politician has had to apologise for calling him “superficially black” for his top wrung, privileged education at Eton and Trinity College Cambridge – and because, not least, when he was talking on a radio broadcast you couldn’t tell he was black.

Well, well, well. A pre-teen lad here in Zimbabwe thinks we could also use a change of government, but he’ll have to make do with a new football for now instead.